2008年2月1日 星期五
OMG! I can't believe I played wii fer four long hours....
wuz hooked to e new game....COOKING MAMA!
Nice n yummy...
I "cooked" 37 dishes in total...during e 4 hours...siao man!
Haha...actually wanted to stop long ago but new dishes kept coming up...so I was so tempted to "cook" de dishes...
Hmm...quite an interactive game...
And how muddlehead am I!~
I actually forgot to bring back all e materials fer my report...
Thinking of goin back to lab tmr to take e stuff so I could finish my report off by this week end...
e remaining time would be left fer me to amend my report...
I'm not sure if I should go fer e ntu admission talk at suntec tmr...
I know if I go...I would feel more disappointment than what I have now...
but at least if I go...I have more "xin li zhun bei" on being rejected...
I think if I tell them my grades...they would tell me to be more "realistic".
which I knew I wasn't fer all these while... I kept pinning fer a hope of getting in...
Getting in is an issue...graduating frm there is also another issue...
but...what fer think about graduating when I'm not even sure if I can get in a not...
Or maybe I can loan money from bank to study overseas...
This idea which I've dropped fer quite sometime...came back to me.
I only live life once....I have to do everything that's best fer myself if I can...
Working is not fer me...but if I'm left with no choice, that will be e only option.
Though eventually I still have to face it...
I'm starting to be scared of working life...
working life means there's a lot fer u to handle...not only work only...it also means stepping into "social university"...
There's no books or guidelines fer u to learn from...
I thought I was already "fake" enough...
but when I was in lab...there are more fake things...that e ppl do...
They are not what they really appear to be...
and some more if you're not happy with some one...you cannnot just openly show your unhappiness...
The most can choose to neglect e person's presence...though most of e time you'll see him/her around you...this is something which is so difficult to acheive...
Then if you're bullied by e higher authorities (loading you with a lot of work and commanding you that OT is a must..you cannot say no)...you can only swallow ur pride and obey...at most go home complain la....haha
If you're working with some one who outshines you so much and you can't do anything...
you'll just have to face e hard feeling of being looked down...
I don't hate him...I just hate myself...
I'm starting to hate myself more and more each day...
I kept thinking....can I at least prove myself...in one or another way?
He's receiving so much appraisal...and you're far off from e spotlight...
How does this kind of feeling feels?
BAD OF COURSE BAD...
XL@清晨7:58
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